PEOPLE: Help! My ASM is USELESS.

[geoffsm]

Alright, so here's the scenario.  I'm stage managing a production of Shakespeare's Henry IV, Part I.  My ASM is not working out well at all.  It's not that she doesn't listen to me, it's that everything I tell her to do is done WRONG.  
-I asked her to return a broom to the scene shop last week and then lock it when she was done.....she locked my keys in the shop.  
-I asked her to sign in actors and call anyone who was missing (while I ran to the props loft to grab some rehearsal props that the props dept. hadn't pulled yet) .  When I came back down she told me everyone was here.  She was wrong, and actor was missing, and I had to explain why he wasn't called to an impatient director IN FRONT OF THE ENTIRE COMPANY.
-She text messages during rehearsal
-She leaves with the cast unless I specifically grab her before she slips out the door.  Usually I'm busy with other things and don't catch her, leaving me to clear the space by myself.
-When we were spiking the set on the floor (before the deck was built), I was taping the 14' square platform.  I laid the corners....all she had to do was connect them with spike tape.  When I returned, I was looking at a 14' x 12' rectangle (HOW DOES THAT EVEN HAPPEN??!!!!!!!?!?!?).  I had to redo the platform AND spike these complicated step units in the 5 minutes before rehearsal....by myself.  

I have talked to her about these issues, but nothing seems to take.  I have even given her assignments to read from Tom Kelly's and Lawrence Stern's books.  She reads whole chapters from them..I've seen her read them....but, still nothing sinks in.  I mean I understand that some people just aren't cut out for management, but she's not even trying.  Does anybody have any suggestions?  How can I get through to her, or at least keep her from screwing things up.  I mean, I've taken to just doing things myself because everything she screws up reflects badly upon me.  I'm getting concerned because we're only a few weeks from tech, we open on the 17 of April.  Since I'll call from the booth at the back of the house (black box in thrust) she'll be the ONLY management person backstage.  I'm really worried.  PLEASE HELP!

[adrianej]

wow....
I have no advice but I do have my sincere condolences....

[ewharton]

If this is educational theater I would speak to her adviser. This is unacceptable and if she is receiving a grade or credit for this course, she should fail.
If this is professional, I would speak to the Production Manager about getting her fired and replacing her with another assistant who actually wants to be there. It sounds like she has no concept of what stage managing is and, even worse, doesn't want to learn. I know that no one wants to get someone fired (it was my least favorite part of my old 'real world' job) but there are plenty of ASMs out there who would love a job like this.

best of luck to you. this is an unfortunate situation for anyone involved.

i can only imagine what tech is going to be like

[Nbayard]

I am finishing a show where my ASM and I have completely different working styles.  Similar situations -- I started the process giving him a lot of responsibility but would get paperwork incomplete and an attitude when I asked for something I needed the next day. Got things 3 weeks after I asked, and a whole lot of other stuff.

I spoke with my director, and explained that I was working on communicating with my ASM and let him know what I had given him for responsibilities - delegated to him - and when it wasn't accurate or on time he understood why.  I don't know if you are in a school situation or not as I am, cause I also mentioned to our SM mentor/advisor my concerns and asked him what I should do.

Try talking to her.  Tell her that you are concerned with what is upcoming.  Make her tell you what she thinks her responsibilities are during the tech.  Sit down with her and make her part of the planning in a way - schedule crew, etc.  I was advised this from our advisor.  Make up a responsibilities list for each of you and rules etc.  Agree to it, and each of you sign it - one copy for each of you.  And then if she doesn't do what is on there - remind her that she signed on it.

Good luck!  Not having ASMs you work well with is not fun - I've had it a couple times - and sometimes you just have to have faith that it will get done somehow even if you do it yourself.

Hope this helps

[sievep]

I can think of a few people I've worked with that are like this . . . .

Unless you want her fired or replaced you do need to have a sit down and tell her that she's not focused on her role or the big picture . . .yadda yadda, you know what to say.

This can be an excellent exercise for you in dealing with incompetency.  You are going to run into it all over the world (no news there), so everything you ask her to do must be detailed . . . .before you ask her to do something think of every way someone could screw it up an include that in your instructions to her.

Example:  Please take this broom to the closet and make sure you bring my keys back.

Since she's not paying attention she's obviously bored, so I'm wondering if there's some assignments you can give her to keep her busy?

There have been times when I've had an ASM of such spectacular incompetence that I banned him from being on deck (he was a danger to himself), and he was banished to the dressing room halls where he wrangled singers.  In your situation, better make sure someone else is on headset back there if you can't be.

It's rough, I know . . .but for every ASM like this there is one out there that renews your faith in the education of the next generation of professionals in our field.

[geoffsm]

Thanks guys.  Part of the problem lies in the odd trust factors/professional relationships that are present on this production.  Yes, this is educational theatre.  My director is not technically a member of the Theatre faculty, he is the Dean of the College of Fine Arts, which is intimidating to begin with for everyone.  He's in a guest artist situation and although he technically has authority over everyone, he is very serious about not over-stepping his boundaries and staying off of everyone's toes.  Normally the practicum advisor for a show (the one grading the rehearsal company, including management and dramaturgy) is the director, but since he is a guest artist the practicum advisor is a separate faculty member, who also happens to be playing Falstaff.  It's a screwed up situation to begin with.  So essentially, we have actors grading actors and a director who is afraid to take action against anyone besides actors.  ..and then there's me in the middle.  So, yes, I'm most likely going to have a talk about my ASM with our practicum advisor (although I'm pretty sure he's noticed, since her lack of focus is very evident when she's the one handing him his line notes and staying on book).  I just pray we get through tech alive.  ...to think that she will be the one backstage cuing a 400 lb. pageant wagon to roll.  I'm seriously going to have to call cues like this:
"Standby Wagon
Are all the actors out of the way of the wagon?
Are you sure?
Wagon GO"

Wow.  Thanks a lot, though, guys...I really do appreciate your advice.  Keep it coming if anyone has any other thoughts.

[kiwitechgirl]

The text messaging is easy to solve: make a general announcement in rehearsal (making sure she's there!), saying that you've noticed a problem with people texting during rehearsals, that it's unacceptable and that if you catch anyone doing it, you will confiscate the phone until the end of the rehearsal.  That way you haven't caused a row with your ASM or anyone else but have clearly laid the boundaries out.  Also, if you do confiscate her phone she'll have to come to you at the end of rehearsal and can't escape!

[ScooterSM]

One thing to remember is that we all have different work styles.  Has this person ASM'ed before?  Is she used to SM'ing her own shows and hasn't ASM'ed (therefore being unfamiliar with the "assistant" or backstage part of the job)?  Although it is a nice thought, not everyone works well with everyone else.  Even experienced, professional SM's/ASM's sometimes have such different styles that it is almost impossible for them to work together.  So if she has any experience, consider that this might be part of the problem.
If she is unexperienced, it may be that she just doesn't understand what her job is, and how things need to be done.  We all understand that you shouldn't text message during rehearsal, but someone who is new to the process maybe doesn't.   What might be the best thing to do, especially since it is an educational setting, is to sit down with her (and with an advisor/faculty person if you feel it is necessary) and very clearly define what your expectations are from her in how she should behave in rehearsals, how you would like jobs to be done, and what the general role of a ASM is.  It is very possible that no one has ever told her these things clearly, AND/OR that she realizes that she is completely over her head and doesn't want to look bad or admit that she doesn't know what she is doing.  We all had to start somewhere, and as you said, not everyone is cut out for stage management.  If your production has the time and the ability to replace her, give her the opportunity to make the choice to commit to the production or to say "I tried, I'm sorry, but it's not for me" and to walk away.  That way everyone has a clear idea of where everyone else stands, she will know what is expected of her, and you don't have to worry about your actors being squashed by a 400 lbs wagon.  Then hold her to those standards that you set by a certain date, and if she doesn't hold up her end of it, you will have been clear about why you have to replace her.

This is not an easy situation for anyone, and I hope it works out for you!!

SSM

[Fitz]

Checklists, checklists, checklists.

As a community theatre SM I get a lot of people who:
a) really want to be there but have no experience, OR
b) don't want to be there but parent/SO/friend has begged/bullied them into helping backstage

I find the best way to cope with them is to put EVERY single thing they need to do into a checklist, put the checklist in a plastic sleeve and give them a china pencil/dry erase marker. (seriously, I include pictures of place settings for tables)

At the end of the night, all checklists must be handed in to me and I check them myself and ask questions. Why did you check off the suitcase when it wasn't actually at SL when it should have been? I see the lamp was in the right place, why didn't you check it off? etc. After a couple of rehearsals with this system, they know it's coming. Pre-show, post-show and intermission lists have 2 columns for checking. Once everyone has done their assigned sets, a stagehand takes the list and checks everything, then an ASM goes around and does a second check.

I've been known to give prizes (chocolate is our friend) for the fastest check, or I've moved a prop 2 inches to the right and given a prize for the first person to catch it. I try to make it fun, and bribe my crews with candy.

In your case, if you can't get your person working up to snuff, and you can't fire her, you will NEED to have at least one other person backstage so you can sleep at night instead of sitting up picturing the wagon rolling over someone in your cast.

[Thomas A. Kelly]

Thanks for suggesting my book to your ASM, but sometimes people just are not cut out for this work.. I would suggest you have found one, and you should get a new one before any more time goes by. You will end being the wrong person if the ASM screws up and causes problems in performance and you haven't done anything about replacing. Brutal, maybe, but safety first; you cannot have a total screw up backstage as the only stage manager.

[DeeCap]

I remember when I got started I was a major screwup, but I had a very patient stage manager to walk me through. However, I never had problems regarding safety.
I would not have that ASM responsible for wagon moves. I would see if you can get this person replaced before she/he runs someone over. Is there a production manager you can speak too?
If she can't get replaced, is there a responsible run crew person who can be on headset and run the wagon moves?
I would also talk to her about this. It's not easy, but it is a safety issue.

[geoffsm]

Much of the problem lies in the fact that there are NO people left in the department.  For some reason, a lot of people chose not to enroll in practicum this semester, so we're left with 1 wardrobe person, 1 props master (also serving as the props run crew), 2 make-up people (and almost the whole cast is playing more than one character, so make-up changes often), and until yesterday we didn't have a light board op.  So, long story short, even if I could get her removed form the show...there's no one to replace her...at least now she's an extra pair of hands when she pays attention.   I AM going to have another person on headset during the show, though.  Luckily, the actors are all blocked to be BEHIND the wagon before it rolls, so there shouldn't be anybody in front of it.
However today, I came close to losing it.  I can't even trust her to be on book.  An actor called line and she wasn't even on the right page, so he had to start his whole monologue over again.  I pulled her aside after rehearsal and told her that she HAD to stay on top of things.  I think it may have helped a little.  Now that she knows I'm going to call her on it when she screws up, she'll probably try harder.

[MatthewShiner]

Well, what you have to think about is "is a bad ASM better then no ASM at all." 

I think in the long run, it might be better to do the show with an ASM, then have a bad one mucking it up.

[VSM]

If you are going to have another person on headset during the show, why don't you simply switch hats with those two individuals? Perhaps the relief of not being the ASM will spur her on to being a better crew person, taking directions as opposed to giving them...?

[chops]

When I have worked with people like this i turn them into a personal assistant.  Not in a bad way but in an educational way.  I have them make all of my notes, type up cue sheets, do the scheduling and more or less do everything for me.  I basically let them become my hands while I sit next to them and dictate.  This way they realize how many things are going on and how much stuff I have to do.  In my experiance this usually takes about a week and then I give them the backstage to manage.  they already know everything that is going on and realize that they are part of a team of stage managers and not just an ASM.  Once they realize your work ethic and how much you have on thier plate they will normally start trying to keep up with you and take pride in the responsibility that you have given them.  But don't let the little things bug you.  So she locked your keys in the shop.  Like you have never locked your keys in your car.  I do it about once per month.  Assuming she has a good sense of humor, make a running joke out of it.