Author Topic: working with a significant other  (Read 5408 times)

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missliz

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working with a significant other
« on: Dec 06, 2009, 04:59 pm »
Hey guys! (First post as mod-in-training: scary! ;))

In a couple months, I'll be doing a show with my significant other. He's a set designer. This will be the second show we've done together (the last show, a year ago, was how we met) but the first where we're dating.

I have generally held a no-dating-theater-folk rule because I like being around people who do different things. However, it has been a bonus. We network together, help each other find jobs, and get free tickets to things :). Plus, our jobs are different enough (he's an architect by day) that we're not competing or anything like that. However, I have also dated an actor in a show I was running once and it became, well, boring. I spent my whole day organizing the show, then we rehearsed together, then we'd go home and he'd just want to talk about the show!

Anyway, who is dating another theater person? Have you or do you work together? Any tips for not driving each other crazy (I can only imagine what tech will be like)?
I personally would like to bring a tortoise onto the stage, turn it into a racehorse, then into a hat, a song, a dragon and a fountain of water. One can dare anything in the theatre and it is the place where one dares the least. -Ionesco

Britney

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Re: working with a significant other
« Reply #1 on: Dec 06, 2009, 05:47 pm »
My boyfriend choreographs stage combat and I've worked with him on numerous shows. A couple of times the company I was working with has needed a fight choreographer so I suggested my boyfriend since I know he does good work. We've never had a problem working together, but usually the actors don't know we're together, which makes it easier.  Another plus is that if I ever have questions about the fight, I can always just go home and ask!
I've also been his assistant on a couple of jobs he's taken for high school productions. I have a lot of experience working with that age group, so I helped him keep an eye on the kids to make sure they're safe and doing what they're supposed to be doing while he worked with smaller groups.

Sometimes I think we tend to get along better when we're working together professionally than we do at home!
As long as we keep it professional at work and don't let any of our relationship "baggage" get in the way, we've been fine.  We can just enjoy working with someone we know and understand.

Celeste_SM

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Re: working with a significant other
« Reply #2 on: Dec 06, 2009, 10:50 pm »
My husband is a Master Electrician and is frequently head rail on my shows as well. We worked together before we were married as well. It has almost never been a problem for us, because we share a similar work ethic and views on PDA.  Our biggest issue is when it's a difficult show and we're both complaining all the time and both feeling bad because neither can fix it. Luckily, our realms are different enough that we just enjoy bitching to each other, and can be supportive.

VSM

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Re: working with a significant other
« Reply #3 on: Dec 07, 2009, 01:34 am »
My wife is a director/choreographer and the hardest thing I've come across is not calling her "honey" when we work together!
Ordo ab chao

missliz

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Re: working with a significant other
« Reply #4 on: Dec 07, 2009, 10:15 am »
My wife is a director/choreographer and the hardest thing I've come across is not calling her "honey" when we work together!

I'm Southern and call people dear/darlin on a regular basis...don't think anybody would notice!
I personally would like to bring a tortoise onto the stage, turn it into a racehorse, then into a hat, a song, a dragon and a fountain of water. One can dare anything in the theatre and it is the place where one dares the least. -Ionesco

VSM

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Re: working with a significant other
« Reply #5 on: Dec 07, 2009, 03:31 pm »
Quote
I'm Southern and call people dear/darlin on a regular basis...don't think anybody would notice!
She most definitely would!
Ordo ab chao

SMrose

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Re: working with a significant other
« Reply #6 on: Dec 07, 2009, 03:42 pm »
First--congrats missliz as a Mod!  I'm married to a TD.  We work at different theatres but we do cross paths quite often @ the same theatre/projects.  We keep the work relationship business (with an occational, "are you going home and would you feed the dogs?").  I enjoy discussing and brainstorming on current shows: he's a great resource and visa versa.