Sometimes you just need to create a goofy topic and hope it brightens your day a touch.
If All the World is a Stage, then there must be performance reports for everyday activities. What I'm looking for here are news events put through the lens of a Performance Report. For instance:
"During this afternoon's performance of POTUS, Mr. Obama slammed his left hand on the table after signing the DADT bill. This was an unexpected blocking change, and resulted in a slight stinging sensation in his palm for the rest of the performance. We gave him an ice pack back after the show."
Or
"Tonight's performance of Convenience Clerks was abruptly interrupted when a 1989 blue Crown Victoria was driven through the set by a patron. The show was halted for a few moments for the cast to figure out how to finish the show with a car blocking their path to the store entrance, then realizing there was no longer a wall and the show could continue."
Give us a show title, the event as seen through a Performance Report, and how it was resolved or dealt with. Standby silliness, Silliness: Go!