Humor: Stage Managing the World

[Calie.Davis]

*sighs* Oh my...I have had many dilemmas.
During our Spring Musical I really stress out.
In fact last year:
I answered a phone : "Calie on headset" and hung up saying "Calie off head set"
I bumped into a desk cursed and checked if I moved it off its spike and wondered if I made noise.
A phone ringed and wondered if it was on que
and finally I hit a guy for whistling OUTSIDE a theatre...yeah...I get a little scary

[jrbucci]

Last night in my math class i was really tired because we had a full weekend of shows and i got very little sleep. We have to keep up our GPA to stay in the theatre department and whatnot so I drug myself to class. The prof gave us a break and said to be back by 7:30. One of the other SMs was sitting a few seats over and said "Thats a fifteen minute break."

I responded "Thank you fifteen!" and all of the MT and Acting majors in the room laughed. All the other students didn't get why they were laughing at me.

[missliz]

The other day at my day job (receptionist at a salon) I told a woman "Alright, we're at 15" when her total was $15. Oops.

[PSMKay]

After reading all of the accounts of Chicago's Lake Shore Drive issues (thousands of drivers stranded for up to 12 hrs last night in the blizzard) I find my self pondering a checklist of exactly what I want to carry in my car in case of danger.  Also a mental flowchart of "signs that you should not turn down this road," as a truly prepared person would not need to resort to such emergency supplies unless a catastrophe completely beyond their control had occurred.

Unrelated, I've recently started a new job in real estate (as many of you have already heard).  The whole training procedure, while thorough, was far too slapdash for my tastes.  Given that I'm dealing with legal contracts and brokering purchases in the six-figures-and-up range, I was asking on day one for procedural checklists.  None were available.  In preparing for my first open house last weekend I wound up building my own: two pages, starting 7 days out and ending with "strike" after the OH is done.  Upon mentioning this on Facebook, my mom's reply was "LOL, I was waiting for that!"

Oh, and don't get me started on the ongoing planning process for my latest web design project.  As I'm going to be doing content as well as design, I am taking a LOT of time in planning. The boss is all, "Just jump in and start posting stuff" and I'm saying, "no, I need about one week of preproduction and three weeks of rehearsal first."

[Jlong]

The Main one that gets me strange looks isnt so much the "Go" but the standby. I was sitting with some theatre friends between shows at a restaurant and I tried to call every bite people took with standbys included. They got rather annoyed but I had a blast haha. 

[dallas10086]

I was watching The September Issue and in one scene a model wearing extremely expensive couture went to the food table and picked up a small cake piled with cherries on top. As she brought it to her mouth, without even thinking I started repeating out loud, "No eating in costume, no eating in costume..."

[BeckyGG]

The latter part of 2010 brought two long drives for me (one 2500 miles, the other a mere 800 miles...) and for both trips got in the habit of calling standbys and go's for whenever we entered new states.  Luckily both of my co-pilots were amused ... and when I was driving would take over the state calling duties.

[LCSM]

The other day an actress was asked what was in her salad, and couldn't remember. As she went "ummmmmm..." I looked down to where my script usually is and drew in a breath to feed her the line.

[Calie.Davis]

The other day an actress was asked what was in her salad, and couldn't remember. As she went "ummmmmm..." I looked down to where my script usually is and drew in a breath to feed her the line.

I love that! So funny!

[Joshua S.]

I'm currently working in one of those big box retail stores, and I constantly use stage directions when directing guest where items are at.  I can't seem to break the habit.  Get some weird looks..  that's for sure.

[Amandanellb]

Anytime we are talking about an interview, I call it an audition. I cannot help myself. I also tend to write things in the same shorthand I use for blocking. Written directions look Awesome.

I am the Maid of Honor in my friend's wedding and I am treating it like a Show (Which they are, surprisingly, really thankful for). It does not help that I have worked on the Church's Christmas Show in the past, which is primarily run by Theatre people with a huge budget. It is unlike any church production I have ever seen. Anyway, when introducing myself to the Vendors and relatives, I have a really hard time not saying "I'm the SM. It's nice to meet you."

[MusicTheatreSM]

Stage managing the world for sure!

My sister in law got married back in October. She is the most easy going and unorganized person ever. She didn't have a bridal party, or wedding coordinator or anything. And didn't do the research to do it herself.  She ask me to do her make up, because I had done it for my own wedding and make up classes and such. I just told her we needed a time for me to do a make up run so she could see it.

The time we were supposed to do a make up run, I call her and she is a mess. Her dress has fallen off the hanger and was wrinkled in the dress bag, and she didn't know how to use the steamer, and she was so stressed...etc.

I go to her room, bring her a cup of tea to relax, get my husband to take her future husband out of the room for a while. put the steamer together, steam all of his tux pieces, and take the dress up to my room later that night. I take the dress because I found a few stitches had ripped out when the weight of the dress fell. I didn't want her to see.

So, I spent the next several hours steaming her dress, getting the hotel to bring me a sewing kit, repair her dress, do make up for myself, my mother in law, and her. Then, no one knows how to tie the corset in the dress. Except me because it's one of those stupid things you learn in college that you think you will never use.

We get to the wedding location, she has no idea where the flowers are. I track them down, pin flowers on and give her the bouquet. Then a few of her friends ask "who is your mom down the aisle?" This starts another bridal panic. So, I track down all the family members that are in the wedding, give them "blocking" for who is walking down the aisle and to where. And then proceed to "call" the wedding party entrances with the music and everything from the back of the audience.

Needless to say, I stage managed and problem solved her wedding. And my in-laws who were iffy in the beginning found my career choice to have saved her wedding because no one else would have known what to do.

Other stage managing the world in life:
My dog/cat/fish all have a schedule to eat and go to the bathroom on.
Our wedding program was in the form of a playbill (starring: us, producers: parents, artistc: musicians, readers, priest, co-starring: bridal party) right up our alley anyway.
I make check lists for everything. bills, groceries, laundry, how to clean certain rooms like which part should get done first
I get antsy when the bus/train schedule is off

[SMGirl1982]

At my day job, because we don't have clocks easily visible and we all have to be finished by five o' clock, the secretary always calls out a ten minute warning. My co-workers inform me that I always reply with, "Thank you ten." I have no memory of this.

[BARussell]

My biggest thing is paperwork, sometimes when I'm bored I think about how this piece of paperwork like the forms in the doctor's office or at the dmv could be improved to better highlight the important details and make the differences between pieces of information more obvious. I told my teacher in a science class that I could not understand his syllabus calendar because it made NO sense, he was not amused.

[megan.s.lehr]

I am really bad about going into SMing mode when I'm managing anything... I did during December when I was subbing for a freshmen choir class (long story) but I kept directing these poor little girls with stage directions and other things and refereed to other terms they hadn't learned yet.... poor girls, lol.