How does everyone else relate to directors?
I know I am young and still learning, but I've had one hell of a time with bad directors. I just cant seem to shake this trend. I can write off one or two directors to them being the jerk, or they don't know how to work with stage management, but I am really starting to think it's me.
I can be a good stage manager... no, I AM a good stage manager. I am an intelligent, competent, confident person... and social to boot. I do not understand why I have such a hard time connecting with directors. And it ultimately always ends up with me making a mistake (or at least having to take responsibility for a mistake) and looking bad in front of the director (only the director... if I'm lucky). Then I get flustered and freaked out and I resent my director--and MYSELF--and I doubt myself. Which when you're starting your career... doubting yourself is not exactly a good starting place.
I've only really worked regional theatre... no where near any kind of union, although we all like to run under equity rules. I've worked with a lot of unkowns, but I've also been exposed to some bigger names... good experience, right?
I'm not so sure.
Okay... pause... I'll be a little more specific.
O... general note: my mistakes almost always have to do with scheduling. Inevitably, I probably could not make it a week without messing up a daily call. [sigh]
So tonight... it was again the schedule. Last night when my director and I went over the rehearsal call, I felt confident that I understood what he wanted. He even watched me write it down. It's in the nightly rehearsal reports. He even said to our choreographer, "So, I guess it's an all you night, again..." So I felt sure it would be choreography. I was prepared for choreography. The actors were prepared for choreography. My team even thought the same thing. I walk into rehearsal tonght, and... "Is our fight choreographer coming?"
I say, "O, I thought that was on the schedule later this week. I already emailed him about the change..."
And then my director so kindly starts scolding me--in front of other people-- going on about the "first rule of stage management, NEVER EVER EVER assume anything. When you assume, you make an ass of you and me..." etc etc.
I didn't know I was assuming anything!! Fight choreography was specifically on the schedule for later this week...the schedule the director wrote himself.
As luck would have it, the fight choreographer did show up. Whew!
But then, I call everyone's attention to begin rehearsal... and the director starts working scene transitions and running lines. I feel awful because my actors aren't prepared. My team is not prepared to track props, etc... it was just complete shite!
He specifically said to the choreographer, "It's an all you night..." How am I supposed to know that means something completely different!!???
...deep breaths...
this is a somewhat tense, touchy subject for me...
I want to do better with and for my directors. I want to learn. I just don't know what to change, if I'm doing everything the way I'm supposed to...
I wonder if it's an intimidation factor, because I am so young... and the directors are more self-assured and experienced. I just don't know how to break through that "unapproachable-don't-ask-me-questions" barrier. Literally, this director practically bolts out of the rehearsal room as quick as the actors at the end of the night. How am I supposed to build better communication if he won't even stick around for questions and rehearsal notes??
The thing is, this guy is not exactly a nobody. He's a pretty big name in our mid-east coast region. He's professional and well connected. I just can't read him [rumbles of frustration]!!! So it has to be me, right?
okay... I've ranted enough. This turned out to be too long a post, but I would truly appreciate ANY advice.