Author Topic: Introducing Colonel Melkett  (Read 1747 times)

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Colonel Melkett

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Introducing Colonel Melkett
« on: Sep 27, 2014, 09:33 pm »
(You should imagine this being read out by someone like Graham Chapman's "army chappie" in Monty Python's Flying Circus, or perhaps General Melchett in "Blackadder goes Forth".)

G'devening all.
I'm Colonel Melkett. I'm not actually a stage manager - I'm a character in "Black Comedy" by Peter Shaffer. I'm played by Reg G., who lives in Okotoks, near Calgary, Alberta, Canada.
Now... I know that you stage manager johnnies are a rather tight-knit group, but I also know that most of you like to help us fictional characters whenever you can. I know my stage manager, Barb, is absolutely top-hole at keeping things ship-shape and Bristol fashion on- and back-stage in our theatre.
As a character, I'm rather an angry old man, what. My daughter's got herself engaged to a lunatic. Everyone's afraid of me, and so they should be! I use a lot of expletives that are acceptable in England (where the play's set), but which aren't strictly suitable for a sensitive North American board like this one, so I'm having a devil of a time epxressing myself here!
Although I'm fictional, and although I'm not a stage manager, I'm in a bit of a tight spot. I've posted a question over at "Tools of the trade" asking about what kind of devices people use when naked flames are called for on stage. Of course in my day, we'd have live ammunition on stage, but these lawyer chappies don't allow matches, candles, lighters or any of that stuff on stage anymore. So I need to find out what's available out there in Stagemanagerland that looks like a working Zippo lighter, but which doesn't have a naked flame.
Looking forward to getting some good advice on the topic.
And although I can't promise to be that active of a member of the smnetwork, I will most certainly forward the details to Barb, who does know a thing or two about stage management.
Dashed pleased to meet you all!